and i have noticed lately from staying in my own home town how much fun this can be. i have gotten closer to my friends out here made some friends that i didnt know went to my school and have over all spent alot of time out here

me and kayla- we are still as strong as ever i love this girl to death and i can honestly say that she has stuck with me through everything she will never look down on me and is always worried about me we have became back to how we used to be

me and ash hole- we have become better friends these past years i can say she has been the one person that goes through my adventures with me she is there for me when i have a problem and always listens and i love how close we have gotten!

me and elissa- this is an amazing girl if you have ever met one she is never pissed at anyone that i know of and she trys to be everyones friend that she can she made my birthday party a blast wish i coulda made hers a blast too we have gotten closer these past years too

me and luke- this kid has seriously became my best guy friend he takes me to school everyday that he can i love him. he is so much fun to hang out with and he always puts a smile on my face! me and him have became really close this year/past 3 weeks

me and clayton- my all time best guy friend this kid and me fadded so much these last couple years but now we are just as close as we used to be he comes over after school almost everyday and i love to see him i am so happy for him and his gf!

me and dylan- okay i used to think that dylan is a jerk complete jerk but after having a class with him i have gotten to know this boy alot more he is really nice and he listens and understands alot that you have to say i love having foods1 with him and ryan those kids are awesome!

me and david- now this kid i swear if he hurts my kayla i will hurt him...but he is awesome i have known him since 4th grade and the years just keep getting better!

okay now that is not all my friends but the ones that i hang out with alot now we have my lees summit friends... the ones i still have...

me and camille- this girl has been through so much and i really respect her i look up to her she is such a sweetie and i love talking to her all over an amazing girl!

me and maja- wow this girl can put a smile on my face whenever she needs to i love her to death and through everything she is right there...

those are really all the friends from lees summit that i still talk to..

then i have my friend from indiana that when he comes back he is going to come to my school!!! cant wait i love him to death if anything is ever wrong he is right there and for some reason he always knows when something is wrong micheal knepper i love you kid!!!

its sad how one day you think this person will always be a phone call away and then they will be there and you take advantage of it so when you realize that it is time for them to go you cant deal with it! i love micheal that is all i have to say i love him with everything i have he is my best freaking friend in the world he is the only one that can make me smile when no one else can no matter what how many friends will fade from him i know for a fact that i wont he is my best friend no matter what i love him like no other and those of you who could care less that he is gone can go to hell he is a great person and you never took the time to realize it because you believed someone and didnt find out the truth on your own!

micheal i look at you like a brother the only guy that i have ever been able to truly trust the one that cares about me no matter how pissed we are at eachother and you are the ONLY one that stuck with me through me and austin breaking up because you have been through a similar tragidy(however you spell it) i have cryed over you more than any guy i have ever cried over. i can look you in the eye and tell you i love you and honestly mean it and i took those times for granted and i wish i could take them back and play them over and over again cause i can honestly say you are the best mistake i have ever made lol

I LOVE YOU BOY AND NOTHING WILL EVER CHANGE THAT!!!!!

EDIT***

okay so life is going the best right now i have an awesome boyfriend he is amazing he is always complementing me and i am happy really happy we have been together for a couple days now and he just makes me so happy i havent had this much fun with a guy since austin if that...i never stop smiling he is just something special and i created a chalenge for myself with this relationship and it is to me not him...as for my friends they are amazing ashley and me still hang out just as much as we used to and now me and kayla are hanging out alot me and jaclyn are hanging out tom and elissas birthday was the 1st happy birthday elissa! lol but yea i am back truly i am back to independence my bf lives here now so that makes me even more happy! and to top it all off he is my age! lol yea i know you guys never woulda thought that was going to happen and i know that you guys are thinking wow this relationship is going to last a couple weeks no i can already tell that it will last longer! because of how he makes me feel about myself! i am going to put up a picture of me and him in a while! life has just been amazing i am doing all this and my grades are good so i get to do more and i figured out what friends used me for a car! because now that i dont have one the true ones are still hanging out with me even if they dont have a car! it is awesome! i maybe getting that eclipse soon! just saving my money now! there is only one bad thing about my life right now and that is micheal i miss that kid more than anything in the world! we still talk i just miss him! soooooo much! but yea me and my mom are getting along she is so proud of me life is just amazing! i love it

but i am getting off here love ya guys

Kara Renee

hey guys so i havent updated in a while since i last updated alot has happened this summer has been so freaking amazing! wow my birthday was on the 10th! it was awesome and then i got the 24 hour flu on wed and was sick all night long so then on fri was my party highlights of my party wow there are so many!

we all ate and then we went to the pleasant hill fair then me and tucker decided to get on a ride omg it was freaking amazing the perfect moment i swear! we were stoped at the very top of the ride and the fireworks went off it was so pretty! i loved it! but yea then we went back and me and tucker were sitting on the dock and he was pointing out the stars it was so pretty then me and jeff were riding the 4wheelers and i taught elissa and ashley how to drive a 4 wheeler! then the boys left so us girls stayed up and were talking to my mom who was wasted and then she went to bed so us girls went skinny dipping i kept getting out of the pool and diving in and out it was so cool and then we were playing dare well since it was my birthday i got dared first my dare was to run around the pond BUTT NAKED haha and say happy birthday to me...then when i got back in the pond my dad and dianas light came on omg i was so scared they seen me lol but diana said she just was making sure that we were okay lol...then we decided to get out so we went in the horse trailor omg that was probly the funniest part of the night! we played i have never...then we decided to make breakfast at 6 in the morning so i cooked the sasage and sat down and feel asleep jaclyn made the rest and i guess i woke up and was like yelling at them telling them what they need to do lol so then when we all woke up i took everyone home and yea now i am writing about this...

the people that came to my party and i am so happy you guys did were

the girls- jaclyn kayla ashley elissa amber

the boys- tucker alex norry shaun micheal jeff ben jimmy and luke and matt stopped by

it was an awesome party the girls time was better than last year but my surprise was better last year!

that was an amazing night <3

Kara Renee

okay so far this summer i thought was going to
be gay after i got my grades back

but it turned out better than i amagined

me and sierra have been hanging out alot i love that girl late nights with her are always the best she is so much fun
i swear and then almost getting the cops called on me was so freaking scary

i have already been to wof 2 times and i loved it both times yesterday i went with my little sister and we met some ppl there it was awesome and the other time i went with a bunch of guys which in my part was kinda wierd but it was awesome! idk how many times we rode the mamba!

but last night i was talking to my neighbor and she was telling me how i havent been myself lately how lately i have been putting people down in my life and yes i admit i have been but idk how to stop it i realize i havent been my normal happy self but i am also realizing my life has been worse than i thought it was and alex made me realize that everyone gets so confused the first time i tell them about how i was put on this earth and idk i just feel like a huge mistake and i think there are only 2 ppl that feel like me and i feel bad for them and i know that this is why i crave boys attention cause i dont even get it from my biological dad but these girls have been through so much these girls are amazing i look up to them just so much because as they know they had a bad life they dont put everyone through it these 2 girls are maddie and sierra yes ppl talk bad about them just like they do me. but no one really looks at someone and thinks about there childhood there has been some rough times in it and no one looks at those they just think oh these girls are nice or oh they seem like bitches and they dont even care about what has happened they dont even take the time to realize what has happened! and it makes me sick.

then i think about ppl that have been abused and like when i say abused i mean like beaten or hit not mental abuse and i feel so bad for them idk what that is like but i know that no one in the world should be put through that! because they will never forget it i heard a story last night my nieghbor told me about her and her dad well when she was 4 years old remember 4 years old she had wet the bed... she went in and told her mom and her dad ran up grabbed her face and shoved it in it and then made her sleep in the bathtub. that story made me think that not having a dad isnt that bad. but then i look at the ppl that have there dads that live with them and i think how i want one so bad!

i guess my point is is that you really dont know someone till you look at there life through there point of view.

but i think i am done with writing how bad life can be i think i am going to change and i am going to go back to the way my life used to be how i used to be able to put a smile on anyones face and i was always there for anyone who needed me and i am going to go back at this in a dif life cause now my step dad doesnt live with us anymore him and my mom got a divorce and yea it is better but now i have to watch shae 24-7 and i get kinda tired of it sometimes but i also love that i am getting so close to her! i have now taken the place of a parent in my house my mom is constantly gone anymore if she is home she is sleeping or out drinking or at work i wish that she would realize how much responsibility i have now how much i dont get to do anymore but i dont mind i just wish she would take that to understanding.

lately me and sierra have been hanging out and it feels great to know that i am her best friend again i missed that feeling and i am happy to have it back. i love her phone calls and what i love even more is her soon to be car lol.

You will never forget your first love. That's what makes it so special. You love so hard, so deeply, and so intensely because you don’t know any different. It's the best until it is over. Then you hurt like you've never been hurt before. Eventually you love again, but you love [ differently ]. You will love more *carefully and more *cautiously, continually comparing that person to your first love

but i think i am going to go cause i have to work from 3-10 but call my cell or text me love ya guys

Kara Renee

grades just came i am grounded for the whole summer with 1 F and the rest Ds and Cs cant get on here you can call my cell phone if you guys want...last night was the last thing i can do this summer...hope everyone has a great summer </3

Kara

sierra just be patient this summer i love you so much you are becoming my best friend again hopefully this wont change it...

camille i wanted to hang out but i am sorry maybe we will hook back up during the school year...

have a great summer guys

__________________

okay so my mommy grounded me and i mean she just sucks at holding me back since i have been grounded i have been to the mall 3 days in a row went on a date with alex summerkamp and also on a date with alex johnson(my x) he was trying to get me back i told him i dont move backwards...but ne way

i can pretty much do anything and i am grounded i think this is the best grounding yet! lol but i went to see sierra 3 times since she has been grounded and i hope that will fade okay so here is the deal i am having a birthday party at my dads house which is in pleasant hill which is right outside of lees summit i will have a bonfire and they have 5 akers so yea it will be fun i am pretty much inviting who ever wants to go so let me know if you want to the girls can stay the night and the boys have to leave at 12 it will be my 17th birthday party and yea i hope everyone can come! expecially sierra! lol but yea it will be fun! if you are staying the night we will have a BIG tent and yea it will be awesome!

well i am going to go love ya all

Karabear